When I Read Giovanni's Room

Hello Friends,

Today I am writing about my experience of reading this wonderful novel "Giovanni'sRoom" by James Baldwin. I read this book this spring and it really touched my heart. This is an amazing book and I think every gay man must read once.  As a proud gay man, I am constantly searching notable gay stories and books. I was recommended this book by an elderly gay friend. I took it from him read it a bit but then I downloaded its audiobook version and actually listened to it. Whether I read it or listen to it is not the main post is about. The post is about, how I felt about this book.
 

Spoiler Alert!
  So coming back to book, Giovanni's Room is a story based in very old age. 1950s, set up in France, in the city of Paris. The story is mainly about David and Giovanni. They are the only 2 main characters in this book. Author of the book, Mr.Baldwin has done a wonderful job of storytelling through the narration of David. David is a hot and handsome dude who happens to backpack to Paris, France and there he meets this alluring, charming, loving but smart guy named Giovanni. But then complexities of David's personality mess up the whole things. And as usual, in most of the gay stories we see today, they brake up. Yes, the book does have a sad ending which we all gays hate to see but still, people loved this book because the way this story was presented. David is the person who messed up all the things. David is portrayed as handsome, irresistible, hot man but David is douche. He was dating a woman when he met Giovanni. He is like one of those guys we see on Grindr who say they are "Straight". Or the like the married men who live with their girlfriends but sneak out to bathhouses in lunch breaks. Giovanni loves David, he wanna be with him but when Giovanni needs his help (without spoiling I am writing this) or when he should have stood up for Giovanni in Giovanni's difficult time, David just disappears back to his girlfriend. And at the end of the book, he goes back to his girlfriend.

  This story is set in 50s, and this book was published in 1956.  When you read this book you will get to know that even back then there were some douche guys were there in the gay community. Dating a man while having a girlfriend back in the apartment. Living double life. Not standing for their gay lover and abandoning them right when boyfriend needs them.  We see all these stories happening in gay community even today.

Author Of Book - James Baldwin

So then why read this book?
We all ask ourselves "why men do that?" , "why they act so weirdly?". Well, this is the answer I guess. This whole story is narrated from David's point of view. All those lies that he told, all those backstabbings he did he did from the influence of certain things from his past. Looking tough, smart and solid from outside but from inside men like David could be fragile, vulnerable, scared and unpredictable.  This is a good attempt to understand the psychology of unreliable, unsteady men.

As I said at the beginning of the post, I am writing about what I felt about this book. What Giovanni's Room has given me personally is an ability to understand people and see beyond the facade of their good looks. Giovanni's room was a dark novel, it was like drinking whiskey on the rocks. But this is something you have to do, to get over something or to grow up. At the end of the book, I do not hate David instead I feel pity for him. And Giovanni emerges as a true hero, man of truth rather than some used and ditched guy.


To all my gay friends I would strongly recommend to read this book. Heartbrakes will be there, sad endings or happy endings will be there. But this book is something like a manual that will make you more clear of any final outcomes. In my opinion, this book is one of the masterpieces of gay literature! So guys, read it and enjoy it. 


Lots Of Love!!!

With Who?

Hello Friends.

Happy Thanksgiving Weekend.

The season is changing here. Colors of leaves of trees are changing, wind is getting colder and overall things are getting quieter. We are entering in the new season of Fall here. While surfing on facebook this morning I saw a picture posted by one of my friend's friends. It was a beautiful outdoor, a bench by the beautiful lake and heading saying, "With Who You Would Be Here?". It was an indication of a romantic moment. I tried to think. I thought would that be my recent ex about who I write many recent blog posts? And the thought changed. My inside voice said "NO". "It has to be someone more wiser and mature person".

 And in that very moment, I realized that I have moved on. I no longer miss him I think. I am looking and waiting for a wiser person. This came as a good surprise. Nowadays I am getting more interested in man's qualities than looks. I am more concerned about the inner grey matter than outer good looks. Well, it is a good thing I guess. With the new season, my life is changing, again.

Happy Thanksgiving to all.

I think I found something.

As you know that this is a place where I write my life’s story. As a single gay man, now I have been writing this blog and been sharing how’s my single life progressing towards finding someone. So, today I am glad to tell you that I think I have done some progress in my journey. I haven’t reached that destination of partnership yet. I am still single, not seeing anyone. But now I got more clarity about what I want in a man. He has to be believer, golf playing were my 2 previous conditions. But now I have decided to scrap off these conditions and shifted my focus to another horizon.

   Lately I have been watching these TV soap operas from Turkey. It started with a male celebrity crush, then I started watching his TV series and along with him, I not only fell in love with those series but also those people, that culture and that country. Today after watching several Turkish TV series I can say I understand Turkish culture. They are family oriented friendly people and I would love to date a guy from Turkey. I live in city of Toronto which is very diverse and we have many people here from Turkey. I would love to meet a gay Turkish man here and date him.

 

 What made me to this decision is my demand. I am not seeking for a temporary relationship. I am looking for a reliable, long term relationship with a man with who I can start a family and raise kids. I found that Turkish men are very family oriented and I am sure that there would be gay Turkish men in Toronto who would be looking towards finding reliable long term life partner to raise family with.

 Am I open to other nationalities? Yes I am. I am not closing my borders, Turkish man is just a preference. My main long term goal is family. As long as gay man has the same goal, I am cool with it. So then I wont mind where he originally is from.

 What’s so special about this decision? See, I have been doing many things to find a right guy but it did not happen. There is a quote by one guy saying, If you keep doing things you were always doing, you will get same results. That means I will remain single. So why not focus in one direction for some time to see if I get desirable results? I am looking for a happy life. For happy life you need good social life, cultural festivals adds a significant amount of joy to it. Even I am Indian, I can no longer go back to my Indian roots, even if I go it will remind me my horrible past. I don’t want that. Dating someone from Turkey will still keep me connected to East. I want to do this, I want to date a Turkish guy and try to live happy life like they show in Turkish TV series. I am not hurting anyone, I will be honest, loving, caring and dedicated partner. Why not make this beautiful possibility into reality? Turkish TV series has given me some kind of hope and now I wanna pursue the possibility.

Let’s see what happens. I won’t be surprised if after six months I am still single. At least I wont have any guilt inside for not had done anything.

Will keep you informed.

Lots of love.

Your Best Gay Friend.

New Season - New Turn In Life.

 This is a month of September and here in Canada we have a Fall season starting. I always loved fall because of its colors. In this season suddenly green leaves turn into Red and Orange. Just a perfect surprise from nature. While enjoying a day to day action packed fun life of summer one day you suddenly stumble upon a tree in neighborhood and find that it hs turned into Red. The Fall is coming. Surprise!!!

 This Fall has not only brought change in nature around me but also has brought many changes in my life. One of those changes are related to color Red. For me color Red is color of Love.  After almost 2 years long hot dry summer finally I am seeing some red leaves in my personal life. :) .  And what makes more surprising to me is this guy is no drama, perfect gentleman. A Man, not a guy.  I am taking things slow with him.  How I met him and all is very funny story.

 Just like advertisements of FMCG products change every 4 weeks, my celebrity male crushes change every 4 weeks. Few years back I got this hot crazy stupid crush on Ryan Reynolds. Then I wished I want boyfriend who look like Ryan Reynolds. Few months back I fell in love with actor and indy film maker Ed burns. I liked his personality, in fact I still like his personality. He appears to be a perfect husband material. So after watching his movies again and again I wished to have boyfriend who has personality and voice like Ed burns.  Just before I saw this guy online, one day while surfing on Facebook I saw this religious post saying your wishes are coming true, comment 'Amen' to accept them. Generally I don't entertain such post but that time something made me to comment on it. I did that and next week I saw this guy on dating site. I said hi to him, he replied and my story started.


 With this post I wanna share this funny story of coincidences. Once I wished to have boyfriend like Ryan Reynolds and once I wished to have boyfriend like Ed Burns. And you won't believe but this guy just look like Ryan Reynolds and has personality and nature of Ed Burns' character Gerry from movie Fitzgerald Family Christmas. If this was less then his voice is also similar to Ed Burns' :)

He is a very nice guy, I am gonna give him time, gonna go slow with him. With him I feel something that I never felt with any guy before. He makes me feel like playing game of Golf with him.  Even though he doesn't play Golf, I am gonna give chance to this possible relationship.

Fingers crossed!

Good Start Of 2016, but still there is lot to do.

Good morning friends and brothers. With sun shine of hope and joy of freedom I am writing my first post of 2016.

What a wonderful start 2016 has given us! Supreme court has finally shown some soft side and decided to open our appeal. They have finally decided to reconsider the old British law which they are still having in their books even after British left us decades go.  After the great Indian election so many things are happening in India. Everybody is shouting to prove his point right. Pseudo-intellectual are doing no job than crying for everything but they never cried for our rights.

  Any way, I am happy that this new possibility of change will give us one more opportunity to get freedom, freedom to live in our home country without being criminal and being who we are. So I really wish us all all the best and pray that we get justice. But dear friends our fight does not stop here. Verdict of this reopned case will one more time bring us on center stage where every indian will see us, observe us and I am sorry to say but many of them will judge us. So this is our opportunity to make sure that they do not get any wrong impression about us. In this situation every one of us is a gay ambassador to the whole Indian straight world. Our one act of un-intention will either make them kick out their wrong perceptions about LGBT community and open their hearts for gay people or will drag them many years away from accepting homosexuality. So in this delicate condition my dear friends please be humble and act wisely because believe me my friends there are so many homophobes out there who could be looking for that one chance to prove us un ethical, evil, alien, mentally disturbed and uncivilized. Please don't give them any chance. I know we are not gonna do that this time, in fact we are gonna confidently gonna show them our colorful faces and show them that we are also one of them. And who knows may be then they will accept us.

One thing is true that even court makes it legal, our fight will not stop there.

Hope,

Indian Metro GAY :)