Friday, 5 September 2014

Life with difficult sibling

(who hates Gays and who might know you are Gay)

Siblings are one of the most important part of life. They are that strong part of family whose presence plays important role in our family life. In a  life he time we spend with brothers or sister are more than the time we spend  with parents and spouses. This important person suppose to be your best friend, good allies and secret keeper. But not all people have good time with siblings.

 I come from a typical Indian family where I am an elder son and I have a younger sister who is far ahead of her age. Being daughter and youngest child she has her own sets of privileges under the foreseen predictions that makes her "gonna staty for few days". Heavily pampered by dad, lees restricted by mother this great sister of mine grew up adamant, arrogant, short tempered and unfortunately homophobic. Yes, my sister is homophobic and she secretly know that I am gay.  It was a tee shirt I brought long back saying "My Ex is a Supermodel" and when I was showing her that tee mistakenly I uttered 'it suits me, my ex was supermodel kinda handsome' and here I stopped. She didn't reacted then but her behavior suddenly changed from next day. I am not open to my family but she has enough reasons to hate me. She is one of those highly educated MNC employee who always has huge tensions and so she use that cause as good reason to bully me. Whatever I say, whatever i suggest turns into some intellectual objection and sister starts debate that ends into tantrum or serious shouting (by her, not me). And it always happens, so if I have to suggest nice dress for her (why not? I am GAY!) she will turn it into fight and blame it as space violation. If I suggest a good furniture piece for her room it will turn into trespassing personal matter. So whatever I say, she has good reason to fight it.

 It wasn't bad earlier. She was calm, balanced and diplomatic person. But now days she just need reason to blow out in family court. And since she is protected under the clause of "guest of several days" all hearings go in her favor and it is me who needs to suffer. Do I get mad by this? Off course. My all gay friends' sisters know that they are gay and they openly support their brothers. They are like best friends. I have good female friends who know I am gay and with whom I spend good time. The see me as brother and we have that brother sister kind of love. By this way I am brother so many women. But what about my own sister? Why should not I feel like having her more understanding, calm and friendly towards me. I did all good initiatives from my side. I always keep calm and took step back when she throw tantrums and solve the dispute. But why not I cannot be what I am with her? Why not I can talk to her freely or suggest her good designer dresses from my gay angle and why not she just listen to it and say "yes" even if namesake?  If she is so much intellectual and graduated from upper crust b-school why she could not control her office tensions and just not harsh with me.

 She mingles in society where there are lots of gays and lesbians. Off course she must have come across any gay or lesbian person in her college or place of work so why she is getting so terrorized by we people? Every person thinks that his or her angle of thoughts are right but sometime person has to move out and see thinks from other person's angles and do things just for other people even if he/she hates doing that task. We don't live in same house but all I want is whatever time we spend together we should spend it nicely. Just like those days when we were kids. She would laugh on my every act of joke and every mimicry and I would enjoy her friendly warm caring presence. But now where those things have gone? I mean if I say we have to spend an evening together nicely and enjoy each other's company, there will be infinite reasons to not do that thing. But to do that thing you need only one reason. The reason of love. That will make you cast off all the problems and so called tensions.

I don't know when my sister is gonna change her thoughts and view about me but I am gonna be the same funny brother, same caring brother, same loving brother and same Gay person.

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